First class lounge, motherfuckers! You can all go fuck yourselves. I’m the king of the fucking universe!
Going to India
See you in hell, mothersuckers!
Fresh and Clean
So I’m in the process of doing a big clean-up of my room. My room is usually very clean, I’m a tidy guy, but as my grandma used to say “If you think that can’t get any cleaner you’re a fucking idiot”. You see, I’m going to India tomorrow and my friend Eija is going to stay in my room while I’m away and it would be impolite of me to leave my room anything but impeccable for her. Plus, to be frank, I’m looking to impress her as she is totally awesome and super pretty. Despite evidence to the contrary I’m still of the belief that girls like clean guys. It’s actually a bit of a thing of mine, rather than exhibit traits that I know girls will like, I instead attempt mould myself into the type of guy girls should like. But regardless of any ulterior motives, it’s nice to have a clean room. Everything seems so much more at ease and organised with a clean room. The state of one’s room could be said to mirror the state of one’s mind. Which is all the more apt seeming for the next couple of weeks mine will be occupied by a cute Swedish girl.
Paranoid Rant #5
I hate rock stars so much. Dudes in bands are the worst dudes in the world. They think they have this sexy entitlement to have any girl they like. They don’t care if someone else has invested a lot of time and effort into wooing a young lady. They just walk in and take her. It makes me sick! The fact is 83% of dudes in bands are only in bands because of the free sex. They don’t actually like music, they just strap on a guitar because they know it comes with a lifetime supply of blowjobs. I propose that any dude wishing to be in a band be castrated. You can choose music or your penis, but you can’t have both.
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]
Graze - Animal Collective
Opening track from the new Animal Collective EP, Fall Be Kind. From beginning as an emotive and lush space-ballad, the song flips out into what I can only describe as some weird-ass pan-pipe led hootenanny. Your move, everyone else.
The cover of The Economist this week is genius.
An Ode To Sourav Ganguly
So I was just listening to a programme on Radio National concerning poetry about cricket and it reminded me of a poem I wrote early last year about former Indian captain, Sourav Ganguly.
They call you, dear Sourav, the Prince of Calcutta
But it’s not because you send young girls’ hearts a-flutter
It is because your batting has such style and grace
and let’s not forget your handy medium pace
Your scoring is due to impeccable timing, not power
And there’s a notable resemblance to that ponce David Gower
There are many who believe that your prominence is odd
Yet Rahul Dravid claims your off-side strokes are second only to God
Overseas you showed that India actually could win
And subsequently shat on the captaincy record of Mohammad Azharuddin
Although your results permit you to walk tall
Everyone thinks you’re an arsehole outside West Bengal
To me, however, you are as sweet as candy
and I hold you in esteem akin to Nehru or Gandhi
Although this is not really due to the way that you score
It’s mostly due to the fact that you pissed off Steve Waugh
So you’re now at the helm of the Kolkata Knight-Riders
And I’m sure you’ll be able to deflect your deriders
Although it’s still quite apparent that you are lacking in charm
Maybe some tips you could get from your boss Shah Rukh Khan?
But, it’s your bat that will talk when you’re out at the crease
It’s not really your job to foster world peace
You’ll destroy all the bowlers without any pardons
And we’ll proclaim you at once the King of Eden Gardens
(via my flickr)
Grant, waiting for the tram to start up again after it broke down.
I think the novelty of those glasses is starting to wear off. Need a shave too. And a haircut. And to smile once in a while.
Reblogged from buyhercandy
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]
Zebra - Beach House
Opening track from the new Beach House album, Teen Dream. The album is another impeccable slice of lush minimal pop from Beach House. It’s astonishing just how consistently good this band are. It’s no exaggeration to state that all three of their albums are faultless. Other tracks from the album have been posted by Britt and Thao, and it would be well worth your while to check them out.
Grant and Tash at Joe’s Shoe Store, giggling about something… probably Simpsons related…
I think we were laughing at Kate saying she was “old curious”.
Reblogged from cankerbloxxom
